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september 4, 2023

the bug man and i have officially been on twelve dates. we've been talking for just over 3 months.


my therapist says i put all of my feelings into a box and that i never open it because that way, i don't have to deal with them. she says it's unhealthy. she's right. it's like i just turned them off and i'm not even capable of turning them back on. i'm not even sure that i want to continue seeing him. but i don't know if that's how i really feel or if it's just the off switch talking. i'm bored. i want more. maybe not with him.


i saw a tarot card reader about a month ago. she called the bug man flighty. basically told me that i'm very ready to be in a relationship & open to love. but that he's very cautious & kind of one foot in, one foot out. he's doing a lot of debating right now about how he feels, but he is enjoying the time we're spending together - he's just afraid to commit & have it crash & burn. she also said she thinks i'll be in a committed relationship by December/January. but that it may not be with him. she thinks there's another person that'll be coming in & expressing interest. she said it's probably someone I know through work, not someone i necessarily work directly with. she said that i should keep my options open. but to also give the bug man a little more time if i can put up with the bullshit that comes with the waiting.











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